Cluster F*ck

There's a writing technique I guess I invented- and if it's been invented before then I've never heard of it, so in my mind I invented it. Haha- either way- it's called 'Rambling'. I just go on and on about senseless shit, and it's probably one of my favorite things to do in the world. :)

What has happened to being happy? I have realized in this world of constant drama- It is nearly impossible anymore to find happiness. If my relationship were perfect, yet I was still overweight- I'd still be unhappy. Or if I didn't feel my boobs were big enough, and got a boob job- do you think that would fill the hole inside? Or would I feel guilty inside for having spent $5000 on something that didn't make me feel better about myself at all? With so much drama on television, the media, the news- no wonder why we all live so sporadic, disorganized, and dramatic. It's all we know...especially our generation.
My mother's generation barely had colored T.V.
Last night I was riding in the car with my mom- and a Kiss song came on, I believe it was called Frisbee Christine? Or something likes this. But I even said out loud instead of thinking to myself- 'these guys were considered the 'anti-Christ'?! What the fuck?! How does the world change so much in less than one lifetime? To the point where even Christian metal sounds scarier than Kiss could ever dream of being- yet they were 'anti-Christ' and evil. What would my grandparents think about the metal I listen to? Jesus! Perhaps we have become TOO open minded for our own good.
I find myself growing wearier of this life day in and day out. I know I'm not the only out there feeling this way- where I do believe that everyday is a new page- a new story. I am positive (haha, this blog hasn't really detailed THAT, but bear with me) inside and I do my best to keep my head above water. I understand that this is all a learning experience for something much more complicated than any mind could ever digest...the possibilities are endless as far as that's concerned. It's just trying to live a simple, happy, and meaningful life is so hard when everything around you is so 'big'! So over the top! Reality T.V. is anything but real, and we're all being brainwashed into drones. None of us are mentally healthy! It's the scary truth! I believe that any single one of us could go to the Dr.  -tell them how we're feeling, and get medication to help. Help what? Become a product of what the government considers 'normal'? You're willing to put your BRAIN, your MIND, and everything that controls YOUR WORLD into the governments’ hands? Why? Because we strive to live a normal, simplistic life- something that no longer exists.
And while that seems some-what depressing, I find it motivating. It all makes me want to get off my ass and make some kind of difference. Since a young age- I felt like I was different than my peers...I felt like there was significance to my existence that is beyond a house with a picket fence. Where I believe that would make my life 1 billion times easier...I just don't think that's why I am here. I have an insight that is out of this world. I have a deep understanding for all that is real, and all that is right. Now all I gotta do is project this understanding. Figure out a way to breakdown, re-create, and plant into the mind of the masses. We need a revolution....for our freedom, our mental savior. <3